Some mountains that we face in life seem unmovable and maybe they are. My heart has been heavy lately about aging, infertility, and feeling discouraged that some of my dreams won’t come to true (i.e parenting). Plus, it’s been a while since I’ve touched on this subject. Recently I stumbled across a great passage of scripture that reminded me of how I can relate to Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego. I had to share!
Have I lost you already? Keep reading…
If you’ve been a reader around here for awhile, you know that we’ve battled infertility for years. We had an unsuccessful IVF, considered fostering and at one-time had begun the adoption process. Often, Steve and I didn’t agree on options we might consider; however, you have to agree to disagree and move on. I never wanted any resentment in our marriage due to selfish desires that might not be a part of God’s plan for our lives.
Friends, it’s been an emotional journey, one of which required some counseling and mourning. I’ll never forget the day the counselor said that. Coming to grips with the fact that I wouldn’t be a mom was overwhelming and filled with sadness and grief.
I also have endometriosis and had laparoscopic surgery over 12 years ago to burn off the endo, but it’s returned with a vengeance. I’m going to have some testing done and my doctor will then offer some next steps. If I had to be honest, some days the pain itself is an overwhelming reminder of the infertility.
Relating to Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego
Relating to Shadrach, Meshach and AbednegoRecently, while surfing the web, I stumbled across a necklace that said, “And if not, He is still good.” based on the scripture found in Daniel 3:18. In that moment, I knew the Lord was speaking to me.
The Lord always seems to know when we need a reminder that He has everything in His hands. Not everything can be unicorns and rainbows, not all of our dreams can come true, not every mountain can be moved. Sure, we can do everything in our power, we can pray and we can believe — but sometimes, things don’t happen like we’d expect. Does that affect my hope in the Lord? No. He is faithful and He will see me through. I know that.
Would you believe that God’s gentle nudge didn’t end there?
I listen to our local christian radio station all the time (99.1 Joy FM). It really makes me feel so at peace. Anywho, I started hearing the new song titled Even If by Mercy Me several times; however, I never took the time to really listen to the words. You know how that goes?
Well, the other day I listened carefully and it resulted in me doing a little digging on the heart behind the song. Would you believe it is based on Daniel 3:18? What? I sat back in my in chair in complete disbelief. Sheesh.
That scripture is about Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, three men who refused to bow down to false gods. As a result of their decision to not listen to the commands of Nebuchadnezzar, the king of Babylon, they were thrown into a fiery furnace. Those men told the King — our God is able to deliver to us and even if He doesn’t, we won’t bow down. They trusted the Lord and HIS plan.
I was astonished at how much I felt like the Lord was really pushing home the reminder that my hope is in HIM. I heard the words from the song replaying in my head, “Even if You don’t, my hope is You alone.”
Below are the lyrics to the song and you can listen to it on YouTube as well.
Even If – Mercy Me
They say sometimes you win some
Sometimes you lose some
And right now, right now I’m losing bad
I’ve stood on this stage night after night
Reminding the broken it’ll be alright
But right now, oh right now I just can’t
It’s easy to sing
When there’s nothing to bring me down
But what will I say
When I’m held to the flame
Like I am right now
[Chorus]
I know You’re able and I know You can
Save through the fire with Your mighty hand
But even if You don’t
My hope is You alone
They say it only takes a little faith
To move a mountain
Good thing
A little faith is all I have right now
But God, when You choose
To leave mountains unmovable
Give me the strength to be able to sing
It is well with my soul
[Chorus]
I know You’re able and I know You can
Save through the fire with Your mighty hand
But even if You don’t
My hope is You alone
I know the sorrow, and I know the hurt
Would all go away if You’d just say the word
But even if You don’t
My hope is You alone
[Bridge]
You’ve been faithful, You’ve been good
All of my days
Jesus, I will cling to You
Come what may
‘Cause I know You’re able
I know You can
[Chorus]
I know You’re able and I know You can
Save through the fire with Your mighty hand
But even if You don’t
My hope is You alone
I know the sorrow, and I know the hurt
Would all go away if You’d just say the word
But even if You don’t
My hope is You alone
I love how the song ends with a couple of lines from an old hymn, It is well with my soul too.
One of the hardest battles I’ve had to face is infertility. And, as women, we are fixers. We try to fix things and we put a great deal of pressure on ourselves. I know from experience. A visit to the OBGYN, where the waiting area is full of pregnant women and their husbands, is overwhelming. I’m easily frustrated when listening to someone complain about a parenting task, and feel guilty when I have an emotional day because I don’t get to leave cookies out for Santa or put together an Easter basket or take back to school pictures, etc. Let’s be honest, if you’re in the same boat, it SUCKS.
I’d love nothing more than to eliminate the physical pain of the endometriosis — even discussing a hysterectomy with my doctor; however, that doesn’t help the emotional pain. These are the thoughts I’ve been battling, which is why the Lord knew just how to embrace me with words of comfort.
I may not be in a fiery furnace, like Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego — but I’m facing this HUMONGOUS mountain. It’s intimidating, it’s scary, and it appears to be unmovable; however, I’m not going to give up. I’ll continue to trust the Lord. I hope you can do the same! Whether it’s battling infertility or facing other difficult circumstances, you are part of a perfect plan. It may not make sense, but trust the Lord, for He is good. Here is a printable reminder in three different sizes.
Please Note: All printables and downloads designed by Live Laugh Rowe are for PERSONAL USE ONLY. Please do not alter the file or claim it as your own. This file is not intended for resale, nor are the printed versions of this file.
Please Note: All printables and downloads designed by Live Laugh Rowe are for PERSONAL USE ONLY. Please do not alter the file or claim it as your own. This file is not intended for resale, nor are the printed versions of this file.Download: 4×4 | 5×7 | 8×10
God has done so much for me in my life. While the circumstance of infertility may not have a happy ending, I know He is my hope and He is good. God is good, all the time. All the time, God is good.
If you can relate to my journey, I trust that you can find some hope and encouragement today. As I’ve said before in other posts, you’re not alone! While I have moments of sadness, the Lord has truly filled that void with so many other great things and He can do the same for YOU!
BIG virtual hugs…
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Please be thoughtful in your comments and know that we have considered every possible avenue (adoption, foster parenting, etc) and underwent an IVF procedure. These are very personal and difficult decisions to make. I know that when friends, family, readers make a suggestion, you’re all doing it with good intentions, but that’s not what this post is about. It was about sharing from my heart and asking for your encouragement and prayers — not solutions.
Alison Arsenault says
Thank you for sharing this very personal journey you are on. I will just say I can personally relate to the heartache you have and are going through. The words to the song touched me as well and I thank you for posting it. Stay strong and your belief in God will help see you through I will include you in my prayers.
Lisa says
Just reading for the first time. Thank you for being so authentic. Feel your pain and ultimately know God is so good. Even when things don’t go the way i think they would, could (or should). Keep on keeping on! Love the song and the printable. A definite reminder of Gods grace and faithfulness!
Carol says
Kelly, I am so sorry for all the emotional pain you are going through. My heart aches for you. I just lost my dear sweet mother and my heart is broken. The words in the song: “I know the sorrow, and I know the hurt
Would all go away if You’d just say the word; But even if You don’t, My hope is You alone” spoke to me. Thank you for sharing. And may God bless you in many different ways. You are a blessing and an inspiration to all of us.
Carol says
I live right across the Mississippi from you and I suppose that is why I love to read your posts. My heart goes out to you but I know everything will work out as God has planned for you. I always say that our lives are engineered by the Almighty from the day we are conceived and all we have to do is live the plan He has for us. The way we accept that plan and the way we live it is how we will get to Heaven one day. I am 75 and I sometimes sit and ponder how my life is so different than I ever thought it would be. My husband died many years ago leaving me with 4 children to finish raising. They all have turned out great because I had the help of the Good Lord to see us through all the heartaches, trials and tribulations. Do I wish my husband was still here and we could be enjoying retirement together–you bet–but that is not what God had planned for me. I don’t understand “why me?” but someday when I get to the pearly gates, I plan to ask St. Peter for some answers. A priest once told me I would know the answers when I get there. And, Kelly, someday you will know the answers too. I wish you all good things in the future, that your health will be improved and you and your husband will find peace, love and joy in life. God Bless You!
Kris says
Wonderdul words Kelly! Thanks so much cor sharing. I’ve been going through darkntimes as well and this scripture and song was much needed. Blessings!!!
Christine says
Thank you for the bible scripture. My life is far from perfect too, but when I trust Him, Jesus, and not worry what others think, I seem to grow stronger. Trusting him moment by moment is where I would like to be.
Amy S. says
What a lovely post. It must have been difficult to write but know that you are helping and comforting countless others who are in similar situations. Hugs to you!
Sharon aka Mom says
So proud of you Kel! It’s not easy to pen the difficult storms that we go through in life. It can be painful! It takes a lot of courage to put it out there but I know that you have encouraged so many women. Thank you Kelly.? The Lord knows your heart and is faithful to complete what is ahead for you and Steve.
Amy says
Thank you for sharing this touching post and that wonderful verse. Although I don’t have the same struggle as you, life seems overwhelming difficult at times and I can’t wait to add this print to my wall. Sending love and prayers your way, sweet lady. xo
Chrissy says
Kelly,
It’s really crazy how to universe works, but it takes someone brave like you to make someone like me realize (even though I know deep down inside), that we’re not alone in our feelings and struggles in life.
I know there’s therapy and books out there to help address these issues we face as women; but it’s nothing compared to having a ‘real’ person tell you that you’re not alone. That your thoughts are not yours alone.
I try to focus on the good that’s in my life so as not to become too overwhelmed. So thank you for the words of comfort. I truly needed them.
TidyMom says
xoxoxoxox friend. {{{{hugs}}}}}
Linda Hutchinson says
Praying.
Diane Walters says
I can only imagine your pain…your sorrow…and I’m sorry. Each time I read your blog I will say a little prayer that whatever road you travel in the future you will have the strength you need to make that journey…
Suzi says
Just finished praying for you and your husband. My husband and I have experienced this agony…we have the tee shirt, shoot, we have the entire wardrobe! So encouraged by your post and how you are open to God’s healing through any way he sees fit, such as song lyrics, etc. Thank you for not letting bitterness take root and clinging to God no matter what! We all need your inspiration and witness.
Lisa says
We love you Kelly! Thank you for your beautiful words. We say those same words over and over again in all of the difficulties our family has had to endure and especially with Allie and Taylor. So blessed and thankful to know that Jesus will carry us through each and every heartache. We love you! ❤
Tammy says
HI Kelly, I’m so sorry to hear of your struggles. My DIL went through the exact same thing and it was hard to watch her around other family members with little ones. But, God has a purpose for you. Whether that is with children or not. I’ve been following your blog for a while now and as a fellow Missourian, I know we both are Show Me!! You want someone to Show You what is wrong!!! Prayers go a long way and I’m sure yours will be answered.
Diana says
I love you, Kelly. {{{{hugs}}}}
Keri says
I am also childless, not by choice. It IS extremely difficult being around all my friends who have had children- some of whom are still little ‘ens and some of whom are in college now. I’m sure even when we’re old I’ll be hearing about my friends’ grandchildren. Sigh. My heart understands your heart.
April Knapp says
Kelly, I’ve been following your blog for a LONG time. Thank you for sharing your story-it is so important for others to hear and it is important to God. I am so sorry you are enduring this pain, but I am so thankful the Lord is showing you glimpses of Himself in it. I love this verse-thank you for the printable!
Debbie Mayfield says
Kelly you are in my thoughts and prayers. Thank you for sharing this song as I had not heard it before. May God bless you and your husband with love and peace.
Jai Want says
Beautiful as always. Thanks for sharing! …awesome articles post, it is very informative blog
June says
My husband passed away March 2nd, he was in a care home, having a stroke after having
surgery. We had a wonderful marriage, he was a great husband and father to our 3 children.
He was always there for me. I miss him so very much. June
Midge says
When I was 21 I had my first child. He is a sweetheart and I love him to death. He is currently living in a home for the severely handicapped. He lived with us until he was 21. After I had him I had 3 miscarriages and 2 surgeries to no avail. We had to relocate because of my husband’s business. We knew at that time that we would be staying in that state for a long time. We decided that we were going to adopt and were told it would probably be two years before we could adopt. Three months after that (Christmastime) we were out shopping and I suddenly felt very sick. Come to find out 16 years after I had my first child I found that I was pregnant. That son is now 32 and has a PHD in chemistry. I know that this is kind of a drawn out story but I wanted to give you hope. Don’t give up. You just never know when you will become blessed. My thoughts are with you.
Colleen says
Oh, Kelly, I had no idea what you’d been going through, you are in my prayers. As soon as I saw the scripture, “And if not, He is still good” I thought of that song from Mercyme, and then you shared those lyrics! I don’t know why any of us have to go through the hard things in life, but I do know that God loves us more than we can imagine, and that is enough to sustain me. Bless you!
Kendra @ www.joyinourhome.com says
You sweet lady, I am so sorry! But I was soo encouraged reading this post especially where you said these circumstances don’t affect your hope in Christ! I read Daniel 3 again this morning and thank you for encouraging and inspiring others even through your pain! Hugs!
Sarahi says
That song spoke to me on so many levels. My husband and I have been trying to get pregnant for what it feels like forever. And every month you wonder and then you cry, and then have hope, and then you wonder and then you cry.
I feel you and I do think even if this never happens for us, God is good all the time. Thanks for sharing this.