Some mountains that we face in life seem unmovable and maybe they are. My heart has been heavy lately about aging, infertility, and feeling discouraged that some of my dreams won’t come to true (i.e parenting). Plus, it’s been a while since I’ve touched on this subject. Recently I stumbled across a great passage of scripture that reminded me of how I can relate to Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego. I had to share!
Have I lost you already? Keep reading…
If you’ve been a reader around here for awhile, you know that we’ve battled infertility for years. We had an unsuccessful IVF, considered fostering and at one-time had begun the adoption process. Often, Steve and I didn’t agree on options we might consider; however, you have to agree to disagree and move on. I never wanted any resentment in our marriage due to selfish desires that might not be a part of God’s plan for our lives.
Friends, it’s been an emotional journey, one of which required some counseling and mourning. I’ll never forget the day the counselor said that. Coming to grips with the fact that I wouldn’t be a mom was overwhelming and filled with sadness and grief.
I also have endometriosis and had laparoscopic surgery over 12 years ago to burn off the endo, but it’s returned with a vengeance. I’m going to have some testing done and my doctor will then offer some next steps. If I had to be honest, some days the pain itself is an overwhelming reminder of the infertility.
Relating to Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego
Relating to Shadrach, Meshach and AbednegoRecently, while surfing the web, I stumbled across a necklace that said, “And if not, He is still good.” based on the scripture found in Daniel 3:18. In that moment, I knew the Lord was speaking to me.
The Lord always seems to know when we need a reminder that He has everything in His hands. Not everything can be unicorns and rainbows, not all of our dreams can come true, not every mountain can be moved. Sure, we can do everything in our power, we can pray and we can believe — but sometimes, things don’t happen like we’d expect. Does that affect my hope in the Lord? No. He is faithful and He will see me through. I know that.
Would you believe that God’s gentle nudge didn’t end there?
I listen to our local christian radio station all the time (99.1 Joy FM). It really makes me feel so at peace. Anywho, I started hearing the new song titled Even If by Mercy Me several times; however, I never took the time to really listen to the words. You know how that goes?
Well, the other day I listened carefully and it resulted in me doing a little digging on the heart behind the song. Would you believe it is based on Daniel 3:18? What? I sat back in my in chair in complete disbelief. Sheesh.
That scripture is about Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, three men who refused to bow down to false gods. As a result of their decision to not listen to the commands of Nebuchadnezzar, the king of Babylon, they were thrown into a fiery furnace. Those men told the King — our God is able to deliver to us and even if He doesn’t, we won’t bow down. They trusted the Lord and HIS plan.
I was astonished at how much I felt like the Lord was really pushing home the reminder that my hope is in HIM. I heard the words from the song replaying in my head, “Even if You don’t, my hope is You alone.”
Below are the lyrics to the song and you can listen to it on YouTube as well.
Even If – Mercy Me
They say sometimes you win some
Sometimes you lose some
And right now, right now I’m losing bad
I’ve stood on this stage night after night
Reminding the broken it’ll be alright
But right now, oh right now I just can’t
It’s easy to sing
When there’s nothing to bring me down
But what will I say
When I’m held to the flame
Like I am right now
[Chorus]
I know You’re able and I know You can
Save through the fire with Your mighty hand
But even if You don’t
My hope is You alone
They say it only takes a little faith
To move a mountain
Good thing
A little faith is all I have right now
But God, when You choose
To leave mountains unmovable
Give me the strength to be able to sing
It is well with my soul
[Chorus]
I know You’re able and I know You can
Save through the fire with Your mighty hand
But even if You don’t
My hope is You alone
I know the sorrow, and I know the hurt
Would all go away if You’d just say the word
But even if You don’t
My hope is You alone
[Bridge]
You’ve been faithful, You’ve been good
All of my days
Jesus, I will cling to You
Come what may
‘Cause I know You’re able
I know You can
[Chorus]
I know You’re able and I know You can
Save through the fire with Your mighty hand
But even if You don’t
My hope is You alone
I know the sorrow, and I know the hurt
Would all go away if You’d just say the word
But even if You don’t
My hope is You alone
I love how the song ends with a couple of lines from an old hymn, It is well with my soul too.
One of the hardest battles I’ve had to face is infertility. And, as women, we are fixers. We try to fix things and we put a great deal of pressure on ourselves. I know from experience. A visit to the OBGYN, where the waiting area is full of pregnant women and their husbands, is overwhelming. I’m easily frustrated when listening to someone complain about a parenting task, and feel guilty when I have an emotional day because I don’t get to leave cookies out for Santa or put together an Easter basket or take back to school pictures, etc. Let’s be honest, if you’re in the same boat, it SUCKS.
I’d love nothing more than to eliminate the physical pain of the endometriosis — even discussing a hysterectomy with my doctor; however, that doesn’t help the emotional pain. These are the thoughts I’ve been battling, which is why the Lord knew just how to embrace me with words of comfort.
I may not be in a fiery furnace, like Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego — but I’m facing this HUMONGOUS mountain. It’s intimidating, it’s scary, and it appears to be unmovable; however, I’m not going to give up. I’ll continue to trust the Lord. I hope you can do the same! Whether it’s battling infertility or facing other difficult circumstances, you are part of a perfect plan. It may not make sense, but trust the Lord, for He is good. Here is a printable reminder in three different sizes.
Please Note: All printables and downloads designed by Live Laugh Rowe are for PERSONAL USE ONLY. Please do not alter the file or claim it as your own. This file is not intended for resale, nor are the printed versions of this file.
Please Note: All printables and downloads designed by Live Laugh Rowe are for PERSONAL USE ONLY. Please do not alter the file or claim it as your own. This file is not intended for resale, nor are the printed versions of this file.Download: 4×4 | 5×7 | 8×10
God has done so much for me in my life. While the circumstance of infertility may not have a happy ending, I know He is my hope and He is good. God is good, all the time. All the time, God is good.
If you can relate to my journey, I trust that you can find some hope and encouragement today. As I’ve said before in other posts, you’re not alone! While I have moments of sadness, the Lord has truly filled that void with so many other great things and He can do the same for YOU!
BIG virtual hugs…
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Please be thoughtful in your comments and know that we have considered every possible avenue (adoption, foster parenting, etc) and underwent an IVF procedure. These are very personal and difficult decisions to make. I know that when friends, family, readers make a suggestion, you’re all doing it with good intentions, but that’s not what this post is about. It was about sharing from my heart and asking for your encouragement and prayers — not solutions.
June says
My husband passed away March 2nd, he was in a care home, having a stroke after having
surgery. We had a wonderful marriage, he was a great husband and father to our 3 children.
He was always there for me. I miss him so very much. June
Midge says
When I was 21 I had my first child. He is a sweetheart and I love him to death. He is currently living in a home for the severely handicapped. He lived with us until he was 21. After I had him I had 3 miscarriages and 2 surgeries to no avail. We had to relocate because of my husband’s business. We knew at that time that we would be staying in that state for a long time. We decided that we were going to adopt and were told it would probably be two years before we could adopt. Three months after that (Christmastime) we were out shopping and I suddenly felt very sick. Come to find out 16 years after I had my first child I found that I was pregnant. That son is now 32 and has a PHD in chemistry. I know that this is kind of a drawn out story but I wanted to give you hope. Don’t give up. You just never know when you will become blessed. My thoughts are with you.
Colleen says
Oh, Kelly, I had no idea what you’d been going through, you are in my prayers. As soon as I saw the scripture, “And if not, He is still good” I thought of that song from Mercyme, and then you shared those lyrics! I don’t know why any of us have to go through the hard things in life, but I do know that God loves us more than we can imagine, and that is enough to sustain me. Bless you!
Kendra @ www.joyinourhome.com says
You sweet lady, I am so sorry! But I was soo encouraged reading this post especially where you said these circumstances don’t affect your hope in Christ! I read Daniel 3 again this morning and thank you for encouraging and inspiring others even through your pain! Hugs!
Sarahi says
That song spoke to me on so many levels. My husband and I have been trying to get pregnant for what it feels like forever. And every month you wonder and then you cry, and then have hope, and then you wonder and then you cry.
I feel you and I do think even if this never happens for us, God is good all the time. Thanks for sharing this.